LIII. Train

The little Martian slides into the chair next to me,

“it's back. “

I look up at him with a start

“What is? “

“the anxiety.”

"Huh?”

“I can feel it radiating off you in waves.”

You shudder, self-conscious now. Switching into the third person.

It's been so long since you felt this. The sinking in your stomach, the tightening in your chest.

It's oddly comforting, it terrifies you how comforting it is.

It's like being lulled out of a long slumberous winter.

It makes you feel at home.

You wonder if you are a self-destructive person.

“am I a self-destructive person?” you ask the Little Martian

He doesn’t meet your eye, he is quite anxious himself.

You're both a little all over the place today.

“What is making you nervous? “

“Everything. I want to get off this train. I feel like it's hurtling towards disaster”

“I know. But you can't get off a moving train, you have to wait for it to stop. “

“ how many more stations? “

“we’re almost there.